Dad Jokes for the Coast Guard (and Beyond!)
Coast Guard Jokes
- What do you call a Coast Guard officer who’s lost their boat? A shore loser!
- Why did the Coast Guard ship turn around? Because it reached its stern!
Cheugy Coast Guard Joke
- Why is the Coast Guard considered cheugy? Because they’re always on the lookout for old ships!
Uvula/November 10th Pun
- Why did the uvula get arrested on November 10th? Because it was hanging out with a bad hang!
Knock-Knock Joke
- Knock, knock.
- Who’s there?
- Coast Guard.
- Coast Guard who?
-Coast Guard you had time to knock!
Cheugy Dad Joke
- What’s the cheugiest thing you can say to a Coast Guard member? “Hey, I used to be able to watch the Coast Guard on TV, but now I can’t find it on any streaming services.”
Anecdote
Once, a politician was giving a speech at a Coast Guard graduation ceremony. He said, “I’m so proud of you all for joining the Coast Guard. You’re the best of the best!”
A Coast Guard officer in the audience replied, “Thank you, sir. But I’m not the best.”
The politician asked, “Why not?”
The officer replied, “Because I’m just a buoy tender.”
Random Joke/Riddle
- Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!