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Dad Jokes: The Candy Edition

Candy Jokes that Will Sweeten Your Day

  • Why did the candy bar get rejected from the restaurant? Because it had too many nuts!
  • What do you call a candy that’s always on the go? A “footloose” candy.

Simping for Sweets

  • Why did the candy simp get a broken heart? Because he put all his wafers on the wrong Snickers.
  • How do simps get candy when they’re single? They use Rich-es!

Capillary and December 10th Puns

  • What do you call a tiny blood vessel that loves Christmas? A holly capillary!
  • Why did 12/10 get arrested? Because it was framed!

Knock-Knock, Candy Jokes!

  • Knock, knock.
    Who’s there?
    Candy.
    Candy who?
    Candy wait to hear your next joke!

Simping and Candy Again

  • Why did the simp get a sugar rush? Because he drank too much Kool-Aid over his crush.

Candy in Politics: A Sweet Tale

In a political debate, one candidate promised to bring back the candy industry. The other candidate replied, “Sorry, but my policies are too Mint to handle!”

Bonus Joke

What’s the difference between a pile of kittens and a pile of leaves?
—> One is a “mew-tain,” the other is a “leaf-pile.”